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Secret to a Happy Marriage

Today is our 25th anniversary. I was reading an article talking about the secret to a happy marriage. I told Vince “I’m going to read you the secrets to a happy marriage.” Vince said “Oh, believe me . . I already know.”

Here are Vince’s tips on a happy marriage:

  1. Do as you’re told.
  2. Don’t ask questions.
  3. Remember everything you’re told because months later, there may be a quiz.
  4. Take no initiative because your wife will tell you everything you need to do.
  5. Eat everything your wife cooks, whether you like it or not.
  6. Do not ask your wife to go shopping.
  7. Do not ask your wife why she leaves all the drawers and cabinets open and never turns off the lights.
  8. When buying a home, remember your wife will occupy 80% of said house and the remaining 20% will be for joint use.
  9. Eat the brownies! (There’s a BIG story to this one!)
  10. If the wife isn’t happy, the husband isn’t going to be happy!

Oh, Vince!! You’re a funny man. The sad thing is .. he believes all this to be true.

I will not post a rebuttal to his 10 things but I will respond to just one – For 25 years, I have asked that he check the water softener salt and change the a/c filter on the first of the month. That’s 300 months. It isn’t like something frivolous I’m asking him to do . . it needs to be done. I’m not sure he’s ever done it on the first of the month. Sometime around the 10th, I’ll say “Did you change the a/c filter?”No, I’ll do it today. Then on the 15th, I’ll say “Did you change the a/c filter?” No, but I’ll do it now and I follow him around til he does it. In Texas, I changed the filters myself. I couldn’t get to the water softener. Here, the filters aren’t easy to change. I know I can but he has to do it with me a couple of times and when I say “Just show me how to do it” and he always says “I’ll do it! You don’t need to be doing it.” I can add salt to the water softener but he keeps the salt out in the shop . . not going out there and dragging a bag of salt back to the house.

OK . . the brownie story. You know Vince and I met on the internet and when we finally met in real life, we decided we’d each drive and meet halfway . . me from southwest Louisiana and Vince from near Atlanta so we met near Destin, FL. I had a recipe for brownies that had a crunchy, buttery nut topping. I’ve lost the recipe and so wish I had it back. I took a 9 x 13 pan of brownies and Vince never ate the first bite of them. I brought the whole pan home with me so for 25 years, we’ve made jokes about Vince not eating the brownies I brought for him.

Reader Interactions

Comments

  3. Happy anniversary! My hubby and I met on the internet also. His list would be similar.

  4. Happy 25th Anniversary! My husbands list would be very close to Vince’s’, except for the brownies, he would definitely eaten them.

  5. Happy Anniversary! Vince should sum up his rules to “Happy wife, happy life!” 🙂

  7. Happy Anniversary, Congratulations!!! He has a list that many husbands would agree with, with an understanding chuckle! Years ago I cross stitched “Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century.” May you have and enjoy more anniversaries!

  9. Happy Anniversary!! The lights and drawers/cabinets gave me a real chuckle because I can so relate! For awhile my husband kept turning off the lights and it would drive me crazy because apparently I needed more light than he did. That doesn’t happen as much now and well leaving the drawers/cabinets open are because I will need something again soon so leaving them open is more efficient, right? 🙂

  10. Happy Anniversary! The way I figure, Vince must be a pretty special guy, in spite of his list, for you to have lasted 25 years! We hit 37 last week. Hope it’s a special day!

  11. Happy anniversary to you both! I’m sure my husband would agree with Vince’s list (except #7 describes him)!

  12. Happy Anniversary to you and Vince. Wishing you both a wonderful day with many more to come.

  16. Happy anniversary!! I raise my glass to you both and toast to at least 25 more happy anniversaries! ?????
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    ?????

  18. Happy Anniversary and many more to come! I don’t pretend to know the secrets, but I have been married almost 53 years to the same guy! (December 26) We knew each other for 3 months before we got married! I could not have made it without him!

    • And he could not have made it without you. Y’all are a great couple.

  20. Was the brownie topping made from butter, brown sugar, and chopped nuts? My grandmother used to make brownies with a topping like that when I was a girl…delicious! Wish I had some now to celebrate your anniversary.

  21. My husband tells everyone that the correct answer to anything I ask him to do is always ‘Yes Dear’.
    We will celebrate 52 years this month so it worked.

  22. Happy Anniversary to a great couple. Those rules of Vince just crack me up. All husbands would agree though. I only know that if you love each other all will work out eventually. That’s from someone who is heading towards 59th in December!

  23. Our 45th anniversary is this month. I read Vince’s list to my husband last night and we had several good laughs about it. Early in our marriage I worked with a lady I really admired who had a very unhappy life. She said if she had it to do over again, she would marry someone who made her laugh. I got that one right, and you did, too. God bless you and Vince with many more years of laughter, and love. Did he change the filter and put salt in the water softener yesterday??

    • No! He has not but it’s ok because the electricians are still here working and there’s “stuff” piled in front of the door to the mechanical room. I won’t even mention it til they’re gone and we can put things back where they go in the garage.

  24. Happy silver anniversary +2 days!

    I made a silver anniversary quilt with 25 silver (okay, some gray) fabrics…right about the time 50 Shades of Gray came out. NO, I was not making a quilt for that book!

    I can see at least one rule Vince breaks all. the. time., so I guess you have good counterbalancing rules. (#6)

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