When I’ve mentioned the books that Vince reads, several have commented that he needs to find himself a good fiction book. That’s just not Vince. He’s such a deep thinker and a no frills kind of guy. If there had been anyone who knew both of us well, but separately, they would been completely apprehensive about us getting married. We’re so different. I am not a deep thinker. I can be but, for the most part, if I want to do something or have an idea, no matter how crazy it is . . I want to do it NOW! Vince wants to think everything through, research it to death and then decide not to do it .. except for the bargain shopping cheap stuff he buys and the one thing he never thinks about is . . where am I going to put this?
Seriously, you could throw out any aspect of life that really matters and we’re totally different. Family. Friends. Religion. Spending. About the only thing we’re on the same page with is that we love living out in the woods away from people.
But, it’s those books he reads that’s probably the main reason we’re together now.
Before we were married, I was living in Louisiana and he was living in Georgia. Vince had been divorced longer than I had and his was quite amicable. Mine was dragging on and on and my divorce was anything but amicable. It was downright hostile and involved visits from the police a few times. It was one of those situations where you never think of yourself as being involved — crazy people get into messes like that . . but there I was.
I felt the walls closing in. A long distance relationship. A child who was not coping well with the divorce, mainly because his mom was falling completely apart and not being a very good example or a strong parent that a child needed to get through something like that.
I told Vince that I couldn’t keep up with everything and I needed to concentrate on getting my life in order and getting Chad on the right track. So . . “we” were over. He told me he wanted to spend one hour with me. Being too weak to fight, I agreed. He got on a plane and flew to Louisiana.
He had a book . . I wish I knew the name of it but he had been reading it and he had page after page marked. He stayed in a hotel. We went to dinner one day, went back to his room and spent probably two hours. I was in awe that he had been reading and reading about how to help me cope with what I was going through. He was so wise and so strong and I realized that he was just want I needed; and just what Chad needed and I was about to push away the one person in my life that I needed most.
The rest of that story is history. You know . . not the end of the story but you know where we are now.
A couple of years later, we still weren’t married and Vince asked me “What was it about that day in the hotel that caused you not to give up on us?” I laughed and told him . . it was the white shirt!
I don’t know if it’s the same white shirt as he’s wearing in the picture but there’s something about that man in a white shirt! He’s dark and . . I don’t know but any time I’m mad at him now, he’ll come out wearing a white shirt and we both start laughing.
So, just like some of you, every time he tells me about a book he’s reading, I want to say “NO! Read a love story! Read something funny!” but then I remember the white shirt and the book and all the pages bookmarked and the way he patiently shared everything he had learned . . all to help me.
I can never fault him for reading those kinds of books. I don’t know where I would be today if he weren’t the deep thinker/reader of boring books/fixer that he is . . and that white shirt! 🙂