I try to think of reasons why but I don’t seem to make friends easily . . not like I once did. I still spend way too many hours on the phone with friends I grew up with or friends from my younger adult life. I have friends on Facebook from when we lived in Kentucky, Missouri the first time, Texas and probably more friends from here than from those three previous locations put together. There’s really not anyone here that I would call and say “Let’s go to lunch” but there are people I would call if I needed help, and they would help. I did have friends in Texas that I would call and say “Let’s go to lunch!” I think I’ve become more of a loner. I seem to have so much going on – Oscar, cross stitching, cooking, canning, freeze drying, now the garden. I seem to get up and first thing I know, it’s bed time. I don’t think it bothers me that I don’t have close friends. Should it? I don’t know.
I have a friend from Texas and they are moving to another country soon. She had posted something on Facebook and I commented and she wrote this back to me:
“Yes just remember that we appreciated y’all and miss y’all always. God bless and be with y’all.”
That made me cry and I’m not sure why. This morning, it seems kinda silly that I cried about it. I even laughed thinking if Vince had noticed me crying and asked why and I had told him because these people were moving. He would not have believed I was crying about that.
Yes, it must have been that I was tired but they are people I will always remember, even though they were in our lives briefly.
For myself, I am like you, I have a lot of things I enjoy doing. I have friends that I could call and say let’s do lunch, but I seem to enjoy myself being alone, doing my own thing. Don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy socializing but I am mostly content on being at home. I do miss my one day working at a quilt shop that has been closed for almost 4months due to remodeling. I think that when we were younger, it was go go go with work, children, school, church, now is time to enjoy life we now have
I am like you. Even though I worked for years and finally retired in 2017, I’ve always loved being a homebody. I know a lot of people but could never find that friend who liked to cook, sew, cross stitch, take care of their family, etc, like I did. But I’m truly content doing my own thing.
Same here. I keep telling Vince I wish I had a stitching buddy and he says he thinks I like the idea of having a stitching buddy but don’t REALLY want a stitching buddy. One thing for sure .. most sane people would not want to come to our home and stitch with Oscar around. 🙂
Nelle Coursey says
I think I have become a recluse. The only places I go are knitting, photography club and the textile group. Other than being with Pat, I don’t see many other people. Sometimes I think I like it that way. I don’t blame you for wanting to be alone some times. But it hurts to lose our friends, even if they are just moving to another country.
Like you I don’t have friends and never really had anyone to go to lunch with.I do a lot of homecrafts and that like the others said stops you from meeting people.I do go to photography once a fortnight but not really making friends there.unfortunately I would love to have someone to ring and talk to at the drop of the hat or go out with,unfortunately doesn’t seem to be my luck .
I understand what you’re saying. I often feel the same way.
Kellie Steele says
I have been super shy my whole life. I think that’s why I love the few blogs that I read. It allows me to feel a human connection, without my shyness messing it all up. Every now and again I comment so you know I am there and that you are important to me, but I don’t have the skills to be super chatty and comment on every post, even though I do read them all. I do have a couple of friends from previous places we have lived, but we now live on 90 acres on top of a mountain and surrounded by nothing but woods for many kilometres on all four sides. I would never have to see another person as long as I live if I stayed home. It feels like we are the only people on the planet and I love the serenity. One day this may change if one of us were to have health issues but fingers crossed we don’t ever have to cross that bridge.
Oh, my goodness, Kellie! I want to move in with you! Would that be a little too much “friendship”? Sounds heavenly to me.
Never feel like you have to comment. I’m glad to read the comments but I never expect them and am not disappointed when there are none.
Your life sounds pretty wonderful to me.
As we age I think it becomes harder to make friends. We had other ways of meeting people when we were younger–school, college, work. I need friends. When we moved to southeast Arizona in 2017 we both struggled with our lack of friends in this neighborhood, I was so lonely. Six years later it’s much better–we have a circle of friends, I’ve joined a book club and met a woman from WY–we’ve done a lot together lately. Friends are so important to me. I have life long friends but the everyday, “let’s go to lunch” type of friends are important to me also.
Cindy F says
I do have a couple of friends that I can text and say let’s have lunch but both of them are doing a lot of traveling these days so I don’t see them much. Neither one of them share the same interests in cross stitch, quilting, and some other hobbies though and I miss that connection. When I need or want to go to a quilt store or my LNS there is no one to invite who shares that interest. I agree with others who say it’s harder to make friends as we age. As an introvert I’ve always had a hard time initiating all the things that need to be done in order to foster friendships and I’m hoping to change that but I need to find local women who share my interest. Guess I need to get out there and find them! 🙂
I always think the same thing – I need to make more of an effort to make friends but then it seems like when I do end up with someone to be my buddy, I find myself making excuses to get to stay home and do my own thing alone. It’s me .. I’m crazy! 🙂
Judy this resonates LOUDLY, I remember my late Mum saying, if you can count the number of friends on one hand by the time you retire , you are doing well. I have lived here for 6 years and have been lucky in the past year to meet 2 lovely friends, one I am teaching her patchwork and she now wants to learn cross stitch. The other is a spiritual lady a virtual artist and it appears we are a pair of scatty, women of a certain age. Have many laughs which its so good for the soul.
between us we have made over 1000 floss drops, it’s amazing the colours looking at me. A couple of hours a night has aid the insomnia of years disappear, yipee.
Read all your posts and as you know on occassions leave a comment, loving pics of Oscar , brightens my day.
Christina, I feel like if you were a bit closer (Ok . . a whole lot closer!), we would be good friends in real life.
Sandi B says
I used to be a really social animal. I’ve become a recluse. I used to live on the phone. I can barely stand to talk on the phone these days. It must be part of the aging process.
Maybe so. I’m the same way. Say what we have to say and get off the phone. No hanging on it for hours.