I’ve told Chad, Nicole and Addie that when I’m gone, they are welcome to keep anything I’ve left that they want. The things they don’t want – sell it, give it away, burn it. I don’t care. I’m gone. I’ve made sure that the things that are dear to me . . letters my uncle sent home from the war that arrived after he died, letters my grandma and dad wrote to him that were returned because of his death, a book my uncle wrote, a picture of my grandparents . . it isn’t going to matter to me when I’m gone what happens to those things but I want Chad to know what they are and what they meant to me, and then he can decide whether he wants them or not. Chad isn’t one to keep every little smidgen of “stuff” like I do.
I’ve told Addie that all my cross stitching – the finished pieces, the charts, the fabric – if she wants it, she can have it but if not, don’t feel bad about not wanting it. My fun was in planning the projects and stitching it. She thinks maybe she’ll take the floss and make friendship bracelets! 🙂
It would be nice if they wanted some of the things but I would never want them to feel like anything I left behind was a burden to them. Honestly, I think the world is going to be a different place by the time I’m gone, assuming I live to be in my late 70’s or early 80’s.
I saw this at Goodwill yesterday. I had several Precious Moments cross stitch books back when I was cross stitching. I still have at least one. I need to see if this is in there. Someone stitched this and did an amazing job. Look at all the outline stitching! It’s really perfectly stitched.
When I looked at the back to see the price and saw this, I about cried:
Someone stitched this for their mom in 1983 and now . . it was sitting at Goodwill. Of course, it came home with me.
Seeing this made me want to call Chad and say “Keep every single thing I have . . forever!” but no, that’s not how things work. Vince and I talked on the way home about it. He said “You know Chad is not very sentimental and he isn’t going to want most of what you’re working on these days.” I told him I’m not working on it so Chad will have it. I’m working on it to keep me from doing worse things!” That conversation became hysterical which I needed after finding that poor, abandoned cross stitch piece at Goodwill.
Cindy F says
That Precious Moments stitchery really touched my heart. I was at an estate sale awhile back and the woman did a lot of cross-stitch. I didn’t buy any of her finished projects but I did wonder about her family. But I know some people aren’t as sentimental about that kind of stuff. I have one of my mom’s punch needle pictures and while she was in assisted living we had another one in her room. I had thought my younger sister wanted it after mom passed away but she didn’t. My older sister took it and had she not wanted it I would have loved it. I don’t know what my sons will do with my stuff and I’m like you. I am enjoying working on them and if they don’t want it, that’s fine. My son’s fiancé’s grandmother oil paints and has a house full of paintings. She will have to deal with those. We already have two of them. 🙂
Elle says
I witnessed this when Mom died in 2007. Most of her grandkids didn’t want anything in her home that she had made herself.
Like you, I make things for myself. With 1 exception, everything on the walls in our home were made by me, family, friends or purchased directly from the artist (4 small paintings). I worry not who will want anything nor what my trustees will do with it.
I will enjoy my home NOW and hope to for another 30 years (I’m 60).
judy.blog@gmail.com says
Exactly how I feel.
Sara Fridley says
Seeing quilts, knitted items, needlework – all of those things someone spent loving hours making – it’s always sad when you see them just tossed out. But I do understand. Guess that’s why I’m just enjoying my “stuff” now.
judy.blog@gmail.com says
Yes. The way I look at it, I’m not taking cash with me when I go and whatever I leave behind, whether it’s to family or charities, I have no say in what happens to it so whether it’s floss, linen or cash . . the instant I’m gone, it’s no longer mine so I’m going to enjoy it while I can.
Tee says
I was just thinking about this driving home from shopping. I had stopped at Aldi and TJ Maxx and saw all the Fall and Halloween things to buy. I didn’t buy a thing. I have enough. That led me to think about what my son will do with all that I have. I thought I should mark things or give him a list that he shouldn’t just give to Goodwill. Things that are either worth a lot of money or have some history. He and his wife, and I think most of his generation and any after him, do not value the sentimental stuff we older folks do. I was shocked when I asked my DIL to give me some of my grandsons baby clothes to make something out of and she said she had given them ALL away. He was less than a year old at the time. This is why our Goodwills and thrift stores are busting at the seams.
judy.blog@gmail.com says
You’re right! It’s sad that everything is now meant to be thrown away. Are our grandkids going to ever have stories about their ancestors to tell their grandkids? I guess if they don’t, it won’t really matter but it makes me sad. I remember my grandmother talking about her young brother who had polio and her parents that I never met but yet I felt like I knew them from hearing her talk about them.
Susan says
I also rescue cross stitch from Good Will. I can’t stand the thought of them being there. I am upcycling them into project bags. At least they will get another “life” and maybe get worn out, making it appropriate then to throw away.
danielle says
Hand made items make me so sad when I see them in thrift stores and garage sales. Also photographs. We have several bins full of photos I need to go through – most are not labeled at all, so they might as well be trashed. But I am undecided whether to give them to a thrift store, or just burn them!
Wanda Jordan says
I have some tintype photos and photos of great great grandparents.GRANDDAUGHTER DOESN’T WANT.Makes me angry but can’t dweel on it.
Nelle Coursey says
If Chad doesn’t want your uncle’s things from the war, tell him there are a lot of Military museums that would love to have them. Even the one in DC. I bet there is one in LA. that would love to have the things. I think you are right to tell them all this. But in case they forget, write it down somewhere. That way they will know what everything is and where you want it to go. I know there are lot of places that would love to have your things they don’t want. Not Goodwill, but schools, camps, churches, Sunday Schools and a lot of other places. The schools are always looking for craft supplies or art supplies. Of course there are friends you can donate your material and knitting supplies to. LOL Just kidding, You have a long way to go before you leave this earth! We were at a garage sale here and I bought 1 charcoal drawing and 1 painting. The charcoal was by Robert Summers from Glen Rose, TX. Look him up. All his paintings sell for mega $$$$. The other one was by a local artist by the name of Smith. His paintings sell for big bucks also. I paid $5 each for them! I missed another one from Robert Summers!! Wish I had gotten that one also! A friend of mine bought it. They were commissioned by Dr. Cutbirth and they were of their ranch and ranch house! Talk about a find!!
Wanda Jordan says
I feel your pain. My granddaughter said she does not want anything. Not jewelry, my great grandmother quilts, my grandmothers quilts she got when married that are embrodiary with names of people who made block 1901. Not the depression glass not letters, watches, wind up phonegraft nothing. Made me so sad. History gone. Daughter says is is the new generation. That’s why Europeian countries have stuff from the 1400 they care about history. Sad too. Oh well can’t worry about it I want be here
TuNa Quilts says
I just have to ask, in reference to your statement “……. when I’m gone, they are welcome to keep anything I’ve left that they want”, have you found a way that you can take some of it with you? I have some quilt fabric that definitely needs to go with me so please share your secret. I’m dying to know.
judy.blog@gmail.com says
No . . what I meant was they can keep what they want, and the things they don’t want to keep, they can donate, burn . . do whatever they want with it.