I don’t always practice what I preach! Even though I always say there’s more good in the world than bad, I’ve kinda let this bad guy get me down and start thinking the entire world is falling apart. I just had a grocery delivery from Walmart. It was a young man, probably just out of high school, maybe a year into college. He was so nice and so polite. I’m so glad had my groceries delivered this evening because I needed to see a really good person.
Last night I stayed up late . . til after 2 a.m. again, thinking if I stayed up til I couldn’t hold my eyes open, I’d go to bed and not be scared. Nope . . didn’t happen. Today Vince took the time to go downstairs to the sewing room and open the door, which is the fartherest from our bedroom, and prove to me that even I would hear the alarm. Duhh . . the alarm is right outside our bedroom door, not on each individual door. I guess I was thinking of the kind that you put on your door and when the door opens, the alarm that’s actually on the door is what goes off. It’s the same alarm that goes off if a window opens or if a glass is broken so hopefully knowing one or both of us will wake up if that happens . . I can sleep tonight. We’ll only turn on the outside siren if we’re gone. No matter where anyone is in this house, they’ll hear the alarm if they’re inside.
Does that mean someone high on drugs is going to sense danger and run? No . . but it means we’ll hear it and be ready. I have such a fear of waking up and someone is standing over my bed. I think I can put those fears to rest and hopefully sleep well tonight, for the first time in over a week.
But, I never stop thinking about that bad guy . . even though he has scared me half to death, I feel so bad that, at least at this point, his life appears to be wasted. IF he decided to straighten up and take the right path, he would an almost impossible road to travel at this point. It’s so sad. I wonder if his parents are bad people too or if they sit home and cry over and pray for their son. I hope I never see any of them . . him, his parents . . but I do think about them all and wish he, and all the others who are wasting their lives, had chosen a different path.