Since Vince has retired, I’ve learned something about him — he talks to himself incessantly! He’s sitting at the table, not 8 feet from me, working on his printer. He is constantly talking to himself. He says about 50 times more to himself than he’s ever said to me.
I’m sitting here knitting, paying attention to what I’m doing so I don’t spend too much on yarn <G> and I keep saying “What?” or “Are you talking to me?” He will say “No! I’m talking to myself. Am I bothering you?” No, he is not bothering me but the one time I totally tune him out will be when he’s asking me a question and then he will not be happy that I ignore him.
I was thinking about it this morning as I’m halfway listening for something that might be directed towards me, and halfway paying attention to my knitting . . but when we first got married, he traveled a lot with work. We were lucky if he was home one week out of the month. We just didn’t spend a lot of time together. Then, after about 5 years of marriage, he was home more but we had the house in town and the house in the country. I mostly stayed in town because Chad was involved in so much that involved driving at night, and Vince stayed in the country so we weren’t together that much.
We moved to Missouri and my quilting was all in the basement so even though Vince was home almost every night, I was downstairs sewing.
Here, we have this little bitty house and we are together every minute of every day. The first few months of retirement were not easy. I joked about it here but I was not sure things were going to work out so well. He was finding his way with his new lifestyle. I had not one minute to myself when, for so long, I had been alone at least from about 7 to 4:30 weekdays.
Things are great now. I’ve learned to say “I’m going to the sewing room!” and he knows that means I need some peace and quiet. He’s also busy with things that interest him, instead of sitting around thinking what he might do next or where we might go. We often don’t go to town more than once a week. I would prefer less but that is such an improvement over what we were doing. Vince does a lot of his in town running around on my knitting day and he now understands that I just will not go to town every day.
He’s even accepted that we have a late breakfast and another meal around 3 p.m. and that’s all the cooking I’m going to do. He heats things up for himself — there are always leftovers in the fridge, or makes a sandwich if he wants more food than I’m serving.
He’s been retired five months but had been on medical leave for three months so really, he’s been “retired” for eight months Life really is good and will probably only get better from here. Those first few weeks, I would have sent him back to work .. anywhere . . if I could have but now, I’m happy he’s home with me every day.
Now . . let me get back to listening to see if he might mutter something to which I need to respond! 🙂