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Hobbies . . According to Vince

Hello Everyone:

Have you been watching the stock market this week?  Exciting isn’t it!!!  As we continue to ponder retirement, we know that some portion of the Judy non- yarn funds must be invested to offset inflation, to keep from depleting the principle until we are in our 90s (conservative projection) and, oh yes, have money for the next craft Judy decides to undertake.  You significant others out there know what I am talking about.  Despite having enough fabric and yarn to last a village a lifetime, one day out of the blue, those dreaded words will once again be spoken.  “Dear, I’ve decided it would be fun to (fill in the hobby of choice)”.  So, here we go again. How many more square feet will we have to add to the house this time?  How many more electric plugs?  Do they make a super, super size mailbox that can hold a 5 ft cube and 500 pounds?  Will UPS dedicate a truck to our route?  I think you all know what I am talking about.

I am not ready to reveal the new hobby, I will let her do that.  What I want to point out is how something which appears to be fairly harmless, can have a very significant impact on retirement planning.  When I try to explain all the tangential (engineering word) things that need to be taken into consideration and their associated costs, what I get in reply is, “well that’s why I have you — to figure out all those kinds of things”  That might be a bit easier while I still have an income, but not when the fixed income starts.  So it appears I have to break the bad news to Judy and they are: one new hobby starts and an old hobby goes away; a new hobby must pay for itself; or the person undertaking the new hobby finds a way to pay for it and places no pressure on the innocent bystanding spouse.  What do you all suggest?  As daddy always said, “Balance is they key to a happy life, something comes; in something goes out!”

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. A hobby that allows creating outlet, and mental stimulation is extremely important to our aging retired brains. You may want to think about allowing all of them.Living with someone w dementia is very hard.

  2. We’ve been living on a budget for nearly 33 years, when our son was born prematurely and we wanted to pay off his bills by the end of the year. We build in an allowance for each person that may be spent without questions by the other spouse. When my husband wanted to build a kayak, he saved his allowance for several months before starting. If I want to go out for dinner more than the grocery budget allows, it comes out of my allowance. We also budget for travel and Christmas gifts every year. If I make a hat for my daughter, should I take the money from my allowance or Christmas gifts? We don’t monitor it quite that closely. I’m a former administrator of pension plans and sincerely hope that Vince will have at least one hobby in retirement. You’ll both live a lot longer! Keep your minds and body active as well. Yes, I’m still working on that one. 🙂 Good luck in this new season of life. Love hearing from you both every week.

  3. Hobbies can make life so much more comfortable for both the hobbiest (Hobby term) and the spouse. I am currently dealing with a broken wrist and while knitting was listed as a great exercise to keep my fingers and wrist working, I find I can’t hold my knitting needles yet. Believe me, my husband wishes I could. I have read almost every book in my Kindle library (almost all free books), I’m sick of TV, I’m sick of my free games on my iPad and I have very little I can do. When hubby turns on his choice of TV that we have “enjoyed” at least 11 times before, I want to scream! Yes, on a fixed income it is hard (we are both retired) but at this point, I think hubby would pay almost anything to have me engaged in something I enjoyed. It is a balancing act but the fact is, hobbies seldom “make” money. If they do, they are no longer a hobby but a business.

  4. C’mon Vince, you aren’t serious about retiring any time soon. I have been working with engineers for 23 years and many of them have worked into their 70s. Engineers are a special breed.

    • So true! Special breed, indeed. We got one…..he was raised the same as the other two! I don’t know what happened. We love him anyway! Vince, you best start spending some time to decide on your hobby. You can’t spend all day shopping or on the computer or TV. Get back to the woodworking? Do more projects on the property? Let Judy direct your days? Each of us needs some alone time and you likely will need to give Judy a break once in awhile also. Many little things to consider about retirement too.

  5. I don’t have to follow the stock market – Bob gives me a detailed report several times a day. That’s his new hobby. For the past several years I’ve been mirroring Judy’s hobbies – I quilt and knit. I also needlepoint. I don’t think Judy’s found that one yet. When she started beading I almost went down that rabbit hole but so far I’ve resisted. Thankfully I’ve not followed her into canning and food preparation – and I doubt that I ever will. I don’t know if that’s a hobby – I enjoy reading about it but I don’t want to work that hard. Unfortunately I do tend to purchase the tools of the trade – Instant Pot and Air Fryer; and I want to thank you for the research you do before your purchases – it saves me a lot of time. LOL

  6. Vince, there is something to be said for the one in one out theory. I have tried it with clothing. However, does a computer go out when another comes in? Technology does not seem to comply with that notion. We can plan as much as we want for retirement and that is wise. But how many people reach their expected age? Being happy in retirement is the most important factor. That goes for Judy and it also goes for you. You have lived together long enough to know what can or will change. The fact that you can write on her blog tells me you guys are going to be fine in retirement just like you are now. And I am sure your Father told you”if Momma is happy” everybody is happy. I do believe Momma is happy.

  8. Excellent. Can’t wait to hear what Judy has found hobby wise! She’s very smart and explains things well. I’ve gone down many a rabbit hole with her as my yarns can attest. These are the things that keep us alive and our brains sharp.

  10. You can always sell Judy’s excess supplies on Ebay or a Facebook group to generate some recovered income……..(just a thought!)……….And then you won’t have to pay to move it all somewhere down the road. Another savings! But Judy has to maintain at least a handful of hobbies to keep her occupied. Otherwise that is going to be your job…..And she doesn’t want to go shopping more than once a week…..

  11. P.S. Who’s posts get more comments? Judy’s or Vince’s. Just wondering…………
    It seems like this blog has become very reader interactive as of late………

  12. Vince, what hobby do you have lined up for retirement? You will need something to keep you occupied and your mind sharp. I’ve noticed for years now that the men around here involved in farming have it as a business AND a hobby and will do it as long as they can. When they do finally retire they have nothing left to keep themselves active and involved. They tend to pass on to their reward within 2-3 years. Think about that. Right now your hobby seems to be planning for retirement, but I suppose you can over think that too. Go with the flow, enjoy life while you can and when you’re 95 and run out of money you probably won’t care any more anyway. At least that’s the way I look at it. 🙂 Yeah, I know, advice is worth what you pay for it.

  13. I have watched so many people in their pre-retirement days go through a period of pre-retirement worry. My poor father-in-law worried so much that he nearly ended up in the hospital because shortly before his retirement, the transmission on his Cadillac went out (the unexpected) and he just couldn’t deal with it. He lost a lot of weight and ended up very very sick, just from worry. I watched my sister worry herself sick about pre-retirement for a year, and my neighbor Wayne, and well, the list goes on and on. I know you want to plan ahead and that’s great–having a plan is the thing you must do and the thing that relieves your stress…BUT…remember that you have adapting skills! With less money, you will spend less money and find fun and creative ways to cope. And I can say that to the last man (or woman), everyone I know who has made the retirement leap claims that it’s easier than they thought after a year or so (my sister was just telling me yesterday that she has more money in the bank now than she did pre-retirement). It’s the anxiety before it does that’s so worrisome, and can make you not only sick, but make you spend like a drunken sailor the year or two before because you think it’s the last money you have. It isn’t. You will adapt because you are resourceful amazing people–you need to count on that in your asset column. You won’t spend money you don’t have. Retirement is a leap of faith in your coping skills, and you two are about the most resourceful people I can think of.

  14. I have been retired for almost 18 years and I have enough money for anything I want to do. Luckily I find that I have changed my needs and wants and recognize the difference. I don’t need as much gas and don’t eat out as much because I have time to cook and enjoy cooking. What I don’t have as much of is time. I was better organized while working because I had to be, I worked 45 miles from home so time had to be used wisely. Now I think I can do it tomorrow and when tomorrow comes I’m overloaded. When someone calls and says can you? I don’t have the excuse of no I have to work. My point is don’t overthink retirement because it will all work out. It’s good to plan but don’t over plan and worry yourself silly. You will adapt easier than you think.

    • I can relate to the time organization, or the lack of it, when you are retired. I also had a job that had time lines – accounting. There was always a deadline with payroll, payables, monthly general ledger and reports, dealing with managers after they got the reports, board meetings, etc.

      This year, I am trying to reestablish a routine starting with my own finances so that I am not doing taxes in October. But, the quilt room is also getting some daily scheduled time! /liz

  16. I think Vince will live longer in retirement if he goes along with ALL of Judy’s ideas! These posts are so hilarious.

  17. Judy, if you need to destash some fabric…you know, to save space for new hobbies, let me know! I’m a scrappy quilter so I’ll take anything down to 1″…

  18. I really enjoy reading this blog, and have done so since my eldest child was a baby, I think. This is my first time commenting. I enjoy watching Judy’s craft adventures, and like her I have many hobbies: cooking, canning, knitting, quilting, sewing clothes for myself, my children and gifts, papercrafting, scrapping, card making….the list goes on and on. In fact, I just picked up a new hobby this Christmas, when my husband bought me a long-coveted embroidery machine. I teased him that he had no idea that he was setting me up with a brand-new hobby, but he just smiled and said, “Oh, I had a fair idea.” Like Vince, my husband is a frugal planner for the future, but he enjoys seeing me enjoy my hobbies and supports me both personally and financially in pursuing them.

    My husband and I are younger than the two of you, but we are already thinking and planning and saving toward retirement, so I find the Judy/Vince perspective on pending retirement to be super interesting. (My husband is 53; I am 42.) I am a SAHM. Unlike the two of you, we have two rather small children–an almost 4 year old and a 9 year old, so retirement is nowhere in the near future. My husband is planning to work until he is 68-72. He is a military retiree, so we do get that pension, on top of his current job. We didn’t meet until we were older, so we couldn’t start our family earlier. All of this is background to say that I really do understand Judy’s perspective, and my natural state is to gravitate toward her approach to enjoying money today….but I am going to throw out some strong support for Vince’s perspective here.

    There truly is no way to prepare for retirement 100% effectively, but there are ways to make unexpected life events less painful. One thing my husband always says to me is that he wants to make sure that we have “pill money” for when we are older…meaning, we need to have money to take care of our basic needs. There is no predicting who will be unencumbered with health problems and be kicking strong until the end vs. who will develop debilitating issues that require expensive treatments.

    One thing I want to suggest is that it seems Judy has full faith that Vince has done a great job of planning for retirement, and that she therefore doesn’t really need to think about it. I suspect that Judy is right. Vince sounds like he is analytical and totally on top of the financial picture. But please consider that in some ways, Judy’s 100% confidence in Vince’s abilities adds a great deal of stress to Vince. Judy, you have mentioned in the past (before you met Vince) that you had to make do without a lot. Imagine being back in that position…but not healthy enough to change it and not young enough to rebuild your financial portfolio, even if you can find a job and go back to work. That’s the scenario Vince is trying to avoid.

    The only way to try to protect yourself is to have as much saved as possible. That doesn’t mean foregoing ALL fun stuff…but it does mean being selective about where money is spent. After all, it is very easy to acquire supplies, but that doesn’t automatically grant us any more time with which to use those supplies. Speaking for myself, I sometimes slip into letting the acquisition of the materials become the actual hobby, rather than the use of the materials. Strangely enough, I have noticed that the less time I have to do a hobby, the more I want to acquire stuff for that hobby. I have had to train myself to NOT do that, but rather find a way to block a bit of time into each day so that I can do the hobby itself. That way, when I buy the supplies, I don’t feel a bit of guilt, because I know how I will use the item I am buying. I do still buy some stash stuff, but my primary goal is not to “build the stash.” In having to work with what I have, I force myself into the very creativity I crave. 🙂

    I hope this wasn’t too preachy. I really don’t mean it to be. I normally wouldn’t leave such a lengthy response on someone’s blog, but I feel like I really know you and Vince, even though you don’t know me! 🙂 Also, I felt sorry that Vince didn’t have anyone voicing support for his position!

    I’ve found both of your perspectives on this topic to be thought-provoking, and they have initiated discussion in my own house. You guys are doing great, and I have full faith that you will sail into retirement. Thanks for writing the blog, Judy, and for sharing your thoughts, too, Vince.

  20. I noticed that Wanda at Exuberant Color has started a pop-up shop for completed projects. It’s open for 10 days, she sells out and then makes some more stuff. It’s not a bad idea to use up some of your fabric or yarn and you don’t have to “mind the store” on a daily basis.

  21. Oh my goodness… I am laughing so hard at all the comments … Vince -truly let us know your hobbies (my hubs is gold panning, rockhounding, atving and camping, cruising Home Depot to see what is new and what he needs, maybe once a while in the garden and hunting. His used to be snow skiing, hunting, golfing). Mine are quilting, crocheting, sewing, crafting, gardening, rockhounding, jewelry making and of course gold panning, atving and camping. He never complains about my hobbies as I can always make something to make him very happy. I also do hobbies with him and enjoy them as well.

    This is going to be a very funny posting now and in the future. Might even have to check back to see if there are anymore comments. Hahahahahahahahah

  22. My parents had the one in, one out rule and died in their 90s with a house full of antiques and collections from Germany and Japan and wherever else they traveled. I like the idea, but is it practical? Not always. I enjoy Vince’s posts and Judy’s posts, and the comments. This might be the only blog where I read ALL the comments! And I get some smiles and a few laughs all the way around. You are keeping me healthy. =) I’ve been retired for 13 years (ack!) and I find things always work out. I do have plans, and I do have a budget, but things still always work out. I credit my tithing habit for that. =)

  23. My husband is one that takes hobbies too far, so I can sympathize. A free goldfish with a box of floor cleaner at the store turned into three 30 gallon aquariums 3 months later, one of them saltwater. When CBs were the craze, we didn’t just have one in each car, we had a base station wtih a 30 foot antenna on our roof. Then there was photography. Taking pictures wasn’t enough. We had to have a darkroom in a closet in the hallway. Then it was model shipbuilding and we ended up with a room full of schooners and frigates and sailing ships of all varieties at several hundred dollars a pop. Next, was astronomy. First it was a small telescope and that wasn’t good enough, so he went through several bigger ones until we ended up with a 10 inch Meade telescope mounted on a concrete pillar in our backyard, adjacent to a shed with heat and electricity so he could monitor the scope on his computer and do astrophotography. Next, he wanted to grow some cherry tomatoes in the winter. It will save us money, he said, because they’re so expensive in the store. So we started with a hydropinic system (the same one you guys had at one point), which grew into a whole series of grow lights suspended from the ceiling in the basement inside of a plastic greenhouse, indoors. (We never got any cherry tomatoes, they got some kind of disease.) Now, he’s into the Arduo stuff, and I’m keeping a close eye on how far he takes it!!

    So, I can relate. My approach to hobbies is much more conservative. I knit and crochet, sew and quilt, garden and do other crafts. But I don’t keep much on hand in the way of stash. I buy what I need for whatever project I want to make and when it’s done, the supplies are mostly gone. The only things I have to find storage space for are the tools..I have my creative outlet, our house isn’t overrun with stash, and I don’t bust the budget buying stuff I might or might not use someday.

  24. I understand what you are saying. But if the new hobby generates income or is good for both of you, why would you not want her to develop her talents? I have always heard “If mama ain’t happy, then nobody’s happy!” AND it depends on whether it benefits both of you or not. Just think of all the pros and cons of it before you judge. I don’t have a clue what the new hobby is but knowing Judy, it is something she can do that will benefit her home and family. I have always heard that a hearse does not have a u-haul attached to it. LOL

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