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September 8, 2008

Life – a Bit Personal

The news lately – the politics specifically – is driving me nuts.  Yes, I could turn the TV off and I do but sometimes I want to see what’s happening with the hurricane and as soon as I turn the TV on, I’m bombarded with politics.

I am disabling comments for this specific post simply because I know everyone has an opinion when it comes to the abortion issue and most of them are very strong.  But, I have a personal story I’d like to share . . a real life side of this issue.

I’ve never had an abortion, nor have I ever had a teen daughter or teen son come to me to state that she/his girlfriend is pregnant.  Nor am I a doctor who can state with certainty when life actually begins.  I don’t even think the “when does life begin” question is a concern any more with the late term abortions that are offered.  I think it totally boils down to convenience.  Oh, I realize there are cases of rape or incest that come up but my guess is the largest percentage of abortions are about convenience.

In the early 80’s I tried and tried to get pregnant and could not.  We went through everything possible at that time to make it happen.  In 1984, it did finally happen and I was pregnant . . I can’t even think of the words to describe how I felt.  Not long into my pregnancy, I had a miscarriage and was never able to get pregnant again.  To some, this may sound crazy, but I’ve kept my 1984 calendar all these years. It has all my notes – pregnancy confirmed, doctor’s appointments and the date I lost the baby.  24 years later, as I write this, I still cry over that loss.

Silly me . . I was trying to be a virtuous woman even back in 1984 so you see . . this isn’t something new for me.  After 24+ years, you’d think I’d just give up!  The getting up while it is still night gets me every time!  The purple silk clothing . . that part I have down! 🙂  And, I must’ve liked lime green even back then!

In 1987, a young single lady whom I never met, found herself pregnant.  I do not know how seriously she considered abortion but in the end, she decided to give the baby up for adoption.  I heard that she continued to live at home and hide her pregnancy from her parents and I’m not sure they ever knew.   Think that might have been a bit inconvenient for her?  But, she perservered and gave me one of the greatest blessings I’ve ever received.  Almost 21 years ago, this bundle of joy was placed in my arms and my life has never ever been the same.

To think that Chad’s life could have been wiped away as if he were never conceived, even though no one had ever touched him, seen him or held him, because he was not yet born, and to some, he wasn’t a “life” yet . .  by the decision made by a teen under tremendous stress — it makes no sense at all to me.

Whether or not having an abortion, or having a baby and giving it up for adoption has positive or negative life changing affects on a young woman, I cannot say.  But I can tell you that receiving a baby you could never have on your own, has a positive life changing affect on a family.  That much I know from personal experience.

I cannot even think, nor do I want to think of what my life would be like without Chad.  And, to this birth mother who I will probably never have the pleasure of meeting, you had a choice, and chose life . . I cannot thank you enough.  No form of “thank you” seems adequate.  I thank you for choosing life, whether or not I had been the recipient of that life.

But, I was the recipient of that life and there isn’t a single day that goes by that I don’t pray for this young man, who will always be my baby, as well as the birth mother who made the choice that changed my life, and to whom I’ve never been able to say “thank you”.

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